LBC is back…
Now that the Michigan Presidential Primary is past, I can get back to opining and writing about local politics and political figures. I self-imposed a blogging moratorium on myself because some cranks were concerned that I would shave my reportage to favor one particular candidate over another. Because of my job at the Michigan Republican Party, it made sense to be above the fray. Now that the primary is passed, I can get back to what I do best. Sorry it’s been so long since I last posted. I promise not to let my loyal readers down.
January 29, 2008 at 4:30 am
I wonder how the MEDC will claim credit for this high-tech development?
January 29, 2008 at 12:00 pm
Any chance the Governor will claim this as “one new job created!” in her speech tonight?
–Nick
http://www.RightMichigan.com
January 29, 2008 at 1:01 pm
Probably, but let’s not forget to count the economic impact of my decision. We’re probably looking at anywhere from 50-100 jobs saved and created, by MEDC-based math.
January 30, 2008 at 3:39 am
According to Granholm, as noted from her speech tonight, government is responsible for all job creation - businesses just can’t do it on their own without help from government.
So the big question is, what kind of incentives is Granholm giving away for this bit of job creation?
January 30, 2008 at 6:01 am
Granholm’s speech can’t top Kwame’s.
The leaked text:
Thank you Reverend.
My fellow Detroiters, my friends, my people.
To assure you that I know you want me to appear sincere, I will do my best to produce actual teardrops and have them stream down my face over the next several minutes. My voice will also become quavery at key moments and I may pause to steady myself at the podium for added dramatic effect.
I stand before you today to do the best I can to say I’m sorry and appear to be throwing myself at your mercy and God’s mercy.
I do not hesitate to call God into this matter. He knows everything and He will forgive me, even if I try to minimize what I’ve done. Even if I don’t actually own up to any specific immoral or criminal acts with these words, God can read my heart. He was there as my Witness when I took an oath on the stand to tell the truth and He knows the real deal, although its not going to be possible for me to tell you what that is.
I am grateful for the careful strategy and planning that has allowed me to appeal to you from His House this evening. The opportunity to speak from such a sympathetic venue and backdrop as I try mightily to dodge accountability was truly an answer to prayers.
I greatly regret the events of the last week. The pain that has befallen our great city. Most of all, I regret being caught. I am truly sorry for the pain my being caught doing something that could be interpreted by some as wrong has possibly caused my family.
As a former college football star and the son of a member of Congress, I am supposed to be untouchable. Aside from accusations about questionable credit card charges and rumors of one night at the Manoogian, my reputation for doing good for Detroit has been well known among my friends and confidantes.
For those who believe I have made bad decisions that have brought me to where I am today, I would like to say that I have been under crazy pressure. When you are Mayor, everyone wants a piece of you, but WXYZ reporter Steve Wilson takes it to a new level. That guy has been hounding me for years, just relentlessly. Even when my bodyguards physically beat him, he continues coming after me. He’s like some kind of terminator dude.
This inability to shake Wilson has driven me to the brink of madness. Kwame lost track of who Kwame was. Despite repeated counseling sessions from one of my closest aides, often in relaxing surroundings, I have been unable to get Steve Wilson out of my head.
But today, realizing that I have so many people behind me, no matter what I may or may not have done, gives me the strength to go on.
So I pledge to you today that with your help, I will continue as Mayor of Detroit.
Together, we can put aside the past. Together, we can seize the future.
Together, we can give me another chance to not get caught.
January 30, 2008 at 6:46 pm
FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE January 30, 2008
GOV. MITCH DANIELS WELCOMES LBC TO INDIANA
“I own Granholm,” says Daniels.
Indianapolis, IN — Gov. Mitch Daniels proudly announced LBC is moving to the Hoosier state.
“I offered LBC Cool City grants, 21st Century Jobs funds, the works,” said the MEDC’s James Epilito. “But LBC told me that was like getting a discount at a restaurant with bad service and bad food. On the other hand, the MEDC made the sun rise in the east for the 953rd straight time this morning.”
Gov. Daniels said, “Granholm is MY economic development corporation!”